A Globoforce employee recognition survey has shown that only 17% of employees feel recognised by their managers who said they show recognition.
Just seeing those numbers gives me an idea of the frustration that both sides experience. While the managers try to do their best in showing appreciation, it does not reach the vast majority of employees. The domino effect this gap has on productivity, company culture, staff satisfaction and customer ratings makes me cringe.
The situation reminds me of the managers I met during the 1-year Leadership and Management course I took. They often expressed their powerlessness in reaching unhappy employees.
And I remember clearly the times as an employee. I was aware that the manager showed appreciation, but it often did not reach my heart. The manager was frustrated, and I felt something is wrong with me. I was grateful but did not feel it.
What is the cause
For the last 14 years, I have explored the goodness in conflict. Last year I experienced a breakthrough. I discovered that the actual cause of conflict is our need to defend our values. Our emotions are responses to our values. If someone shows recognition and appreciation in a way that connects with my values, joy, happiness and satisfaction go on a high. If they don’t connect with my values, then I respond neutrally at best or even have unpleasant emotions.
The cause of the appreciation gap is the disconnect between the way that appreciation is shown and the way each individual prefers to receive it.
What to do about it
Gary Chapman and Paul White suggest that there are 5 Languages of Appreciation – Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Tangible Gifts and Physical Touch. Learning to show appreciation to an individual – be it colleague, team member or manager – in the language they prefer makes a big difference. Mine is quality time, so if a manager wants to show me appreciation for a job well done, I value spending meaningful time over a financial bonus.
How can you know someone’s preferred language?
To take the guesswork out, a certified facilitator of Appreciation at Work can teach your managers and workforce show appreciation to one another effectively. During a four-session training, participants will discover their preferred language of appreciation and explore how to appreciate others in a meaningful way. This gets your team set up for building an appreciation culture that works.
Happy staff, happy customers, happy boss.
