In the mid-2000’s I had the privilege of leading a pioneer team of four. Quite early on we discovered that according to a test we undertook, we were a perfect mix of personalities and should exceed any expectations. However, we didn’t go very far and crashed. In our quest to establish something new, we had overlooked a critical ingredient which makes the perfect team succeed – character.
We had many arguments and continually hurt each other. I was all but a good leader. Because of my inability to handle our differences, I was controlling and manipulating. The more we tried to prevent arguments the worse they got. As time went on less got done.
Later I discovered we lacked the lessons I learned in my next phase of life – marriage. Without our mentors helping my wife and I find out about each other in a non-threatening way I am sure my marriage would have ended the same way as the team did.
If I would lead now, I’d spent significant time with the team learning about each other’s personalities and how our differences lead to misunderstandings and conflicts. We’d learn how these conflicts can help us become a team of members who complement each other. I would run workshops on different communication models and use several personality tests that help us see each other in a different light. Training sessions would focus on personal development and conflict management.
Over time, I’d hope we learn to appreciate each other’s different personalities, find security in our own, and hit the ground running as a unit.
